I AM fuse-less

I don't have a short fuse right now...I just don't have one. I am mean. And I acknowledge this. I just can't help it. One shot I take puts me in menopause. The other shot I take battles menopause. It treats hot flashes and vaginal dryness. Woo hoo....just what everyone wants treatment from. So I feel like these two medicines are in a struggle to see who wins. My poor body is the boxing ring. It is tired.

Karlis seems to have jumped right in with giving shots. Kiyah likes to watch. I lay down on my side when he does it. She stands by and holds my head, hand, arm, whatever. When it's done she says "all better mommy?". It's so cute. Karlis says he is Dr. daddy. I tell him he is nuts. I had blood work down this morning and an ultrasound. I guess everything is ok. They called to tell me to up my dosage of delestrogen to double what I'm taking now and then triple it on Sunday night. I go back Monday morning for more blood work and another ultrasound.

So if all goes as planned I get our babies a week from Monday. It's hard to believe its that soon. I'm not sure I'm ready. I guess with ivf it is hard to be completely prepared. It's a risk. A gamble. It's an emotional sand trap. I just hope I don't sink.